What do I cry for?

I cry for you. I cry that I had you and lost you. I cry that you lost you...and I lost me. I cry to think maybe I never knew you. Maybe you never meant it. I cry at surrender lost to fear...blown away in an afternoon storm. Vows and tears flowing down the edge of the street mixed with rain and oil and brake fluid...dying love clinging to dead leaves, gasping for breath it can't find.

Then I cry for all love felt and lost. All the tears and confusion and pain of all the years and all the loves and all the hearts that leapt and fell...full of the hope of youth and the promise of forever...only to wind up bruised and bloody...wiping snot off a dirty tear-stained face. I cry for every moment of bliss that faded into doubt and uncertainty...longing...wondering... Wondering what went wrong...what more we could have done...what we didn't do...what we missed...

I cry for the beauty of the human heart, that it breaks and repairs itself...tapes itself back together, clinging to hope that someday, somewhere, someone....somehow...will love us back the way we so desperately need to be loved. So we try again. Bind our wounds and dry our eyes...and we love. Because we don't know what else to do. It sustains us...fuels us...drives and inspires us...to reach beyond fear and remembered pain. Because hope is a beautiful thing...and it's all we have some days.